Saturday, August 25, 2012

The Last 2 Days

Your first love, I think will always be that.

Anyway, I was pretty confident in myself only because I knew how hard it was for me to get over the relationship being a bust. Told myself a few times that it was impossible for me to feel anything about anyone. Then I went out there being completely vulnerable (only I didn't know that at the time) and susceptible to all things about him. Isn't it so weird that 5 years later could feel like yesterday? Possibly I am overreacting, and maybe not. I will always feel that connection with him no matter what. I'll also always have that familiar feeling around him. We were each others' first love, at least that's how I understand it. So to me that means that it is impossible for me to forget him. Wow I'm such an emotional wreck lol. I'd feel sorry for myself, but I know I can choose not to feel this way except it seems like I almost enjoy this "cruel and..." crap I forgot what he said word for word.

I guess I just missed him so much. Then I got used to him not being there so I ended up learning to live without him. Cus obviously you can't just "unlove" someone. Duh people, it's not a button..

I thought that it was so cool for us to text and for me not to feel absolutely anything for him. I thought, "I'm so proud of myself! Woo!" *sigh. I'm still proud of myself, regardless but I mean, I gave in so quick -__- stupid connection. Stupid me -_-


and you thought the previous post was serious.. lol

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